This does sound like it could be seborrheic dermatitis. Seborrheic dermatitis is an inflammation of the scalp and other oil producing regions of the skin (such as the creases of the face). It leads to scaling, flaking, redness, and itching.
Some mild cases of seborrheic dermatitis can be treated just with anti dandruff shampoos, of which there are many available in your pharmacy. If you have already tried this, however, with no luck then you should probably talk to your doctors
">primary care doctor or your dermatologist
More severe cases of seborrheic dermatitis are usually managed with steroid creams or shampoos as well as stronger "anti dandruff shampoos." Sometimes, antifungal medications are used as well, as many cases of seborrheic dermatitis are associated with colonization of the scalp with a type of fungus. Your doctors can give you prescriptions for all of these medications as needed.
In terms of the hair loss, I would not worry about that just yet. The inflammation of the scalp from the seborrheic dermatitis is the most likely cause of the hair loss. Once the seborrheic dermatitis is calmed down the hair should grow back; if not, then your doctors can investigate for other potential causes of hair loss.