Before my accident, I\u2019d always thought of amnesia as a far-fetched plot device in soap operas and B-movies. Now I know from experience: Being inside the condition is terrifying.<\/p>\n
Many years ago, I was in an accident where I suffered a serious head injury. I had both short- and long-term amnesia. I didn\u2019t know who I was and I couldn\u2019t retain new information. If someone left the room for 10 minutes and then returned, they\u2019d have to re-introduce themselves. Hi, I\u2019m Robert. We\u2019re really good friends, we used to work together.<\/i> I\u2019d brush my teeth, sometimes several times in a row, not remembering I\u2019d already done it until someone stopped me.<\/p>\n At first, the detachment was oddly peaceful; I literally had no cares. Then it wasn\u2019t. Pieces of memories returned, which only highlighted what was still missing.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n My apartment was filled with clues to the life I had before my accident \u2014 the sweet, affectionate long-haired cat whose name I didn\u2019t know, notes on my desk from the last story I\u2019d written for work. None of it meant anything. At first, the detachment was oddly peaceful; I literally had no cares. Then it wasn\u2019t. Pieces of memories returned, which only highlighted what was still missing.<\/p>\n One of the few comforts I found was watching movies about amnesia. The idea came to me abruptly, and I asked friends to cull titles. I couldn\u2019t always follow the storylines; I watched the movies over and over, rediscovering them anew each time. Something about seeing other people try to piece together their identities, just like I had to do, made me feel less alone. Here are five of my favorite movies about amnesia, to watch if you ever have amnesia.<\/p>\n \u201cI guess I already told you about my condition.\u201d<\/p>\n The mother of all amnesia movies, Memento<\/i> begins at the chronological end of the story and ends at the beginning. It\u2019s the tale of a man with short-term memory loss trying to find his wife\u2019s killer. As he investigates her murder, he tattoos information and clues on his body so he won\u2019t forget them. When I first saw Memento<\/i> in the theater with a friend, we endlessly post-gamed, trying to make sense of the chronology. But on my second viewing, when I had amnesia, the reverse chronology and intentional story gaps worked! Because my brain was operating the same way. Sudden lapses, disorientation, nonlinear developments \u2014 everything made perfect sense.<\/p>\n <\/b>\u201cYou\u2019ve got to help me remember \u2026 People are trying to kill me.\u201d<\/p>\n Why is it that in virtually every movie where a man loses his memory, he discovers that his true identity is that of a trained assassin, secret agent or spy, (see also: The<\/i> Bourne Identity<\/i>), but when an onscreen woman loses her memory, she just forgets who her boyfriend is (see also: 50 First Dates \u2014<\/i>\u00a0or rather, don\u2019t see it)? Total Recall<\/i>, at least, belongs in the former category. It stars a young Arnold Schwarzenegger as Douglas Quaid (if that\u2019s even his real name), a construction worker who may or may not be a secret agent traveling back and forth to Mars. It\u2019s a solid action movie, with dated but still-entertaining special effects and a quintessentially \u201880s vision of the future. Watching it with a head injury gives one hope \u2014 if Schwarzenegger can piece together his true identity, so can we all.<\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t want to know who I am anymore.\u201d<\/p>\n An Italian fishing boat picks up a bullet-ridden amnesiac (Matt Damon) floating in the sea. He has no idea how he got there, or that he is really a trained assassin (see also: Total Recall<\/i>). The first and, let\u2019s be honest, best film in the Bourne<\/i> series. The thing about amnesia is this: You\u2019re the only one without the answers. The people around you don\u2019t have amnesia; everyone knows everything except for you. At a certain point in the movie, our hero embraces his state and amnesia becomes his superpower, freeing him from his past. If he stops trying to find out who he is, what a nice, unencumbered life he could have on an island somewhere.<\/p>\n \u201cThere was an accident. I came here.\u201d<\/p>\n A glorious exception to my \u201c50 First Dates<\/i> rule,\u201d Mulholland Drive<\/i> is one of my all-time favorite films, and not only because the protagonist is an amnesiac without boyfriend problems. (Rita has bigger concerns than forgotten lovers.) Following a car accident, she wanders through Hollywood in the wee hours, carrying a purse full of hundred-dollar bills and a triangle-shaped<\/b> key to who knows what. Also, someone might be trying to kill her. Dreamy-slash-nightmare-y David Lynch is truly just what the doctor ordered when you have amnesia: disjointed narratives. Altered realities. There\u2019s no mystery to be solved; just go along for the ride. Everything\u2019s going to be okay.<\/p>\n \u201cAbout a year ago, Lucy was in a terrible car accident \u2014 she lost her short-term memory \u2026\u201d<\/p>\nMemento<\/em>
\n<\/b>2000<\/b><\/h3>\nTotal Recall
\n<\/i><\/b>1990<\/b><\/h3>\nThe Bourne Identity
\n<\/i><\/b>2002<\/b><\/h3>\nMulholland Drive
\n<\/i><\/b>2001<\/b><\/h3>\n50 First Dates
\n<\/i><\/b>2004<\/b><\/h3>\n